If I found out my life was about to end, how would I react? Would I have done everything I was placed in this generation to do? Would I leave anything undone, unsaid, unnecessarily messy. I’m sure everyone thinks this way once in a while, maybe more as we age.
I’ve been convicted of my laziness. Again. You may laugh, or maybe you can bear witness with me. It seems like our culture is one that makes us need to be constantly busy, and I don’t believe in busy-ness for busy’s sake. (Grammar and spell check don’t like that at all!) As in everything in our world, there are extremes on the line of busy vs lazy. I am fully aware of that fact. So where is the “sweet spot” between the two?
We have many things that can take up our precious time that we didn’t have just a few years back. However, laziness is nothing new. Even in the Bible, in Psalms and Proverbs especially, laziness is compared to the diligence of the ant, that prepares her bread in the summer and gathers her food in harvest. (Proverbs 6:8) The New Testament tells us that the things we do are to be done as to the Lord and that we are to run with endurance the race that is set before us. (Ephesians and Hebrews) And even in 2 Thessalonians 3:10, Paul wrote these inspired words, “ For even when we were with you, this we commanded you: that if any would not work, neither should he eat.” So, I know that “doing” is godly.
We also like to pull out the Psalm that tells us to Be still! (Psalm 46:10) What could be more imperative than that? And other scriptures that remind us to listen first, hear God’s voice, and then walk in His ways. (Isaiah 30:21)
I guess the balance then, is in the way we break up our times of quiet and business. Are you, like me, a list maker? Do you start your day checking the to-do list and at the end of the day do you flog yourself for what didn’t get done? I have to ask myself why it didn’t get done. Was it because of another necessary task that had to have priority? Or was it facebook or tv that kept me from completing my list.
When my children were at home, they always took priority over anything else I was doing. I may have been in the middle of cleaning the bathroom, or some other task that needed finishing, but as soon as I could stop, they got my full attention. I realized that the dust and dishes would still be there after they went to bed, and certainly after they left home. But I also had the responsibility of keeping a sanitary and healthy environment in our home. Sometimes, we did the chores together and had meaningful moments and talks in that time also. So, don’t let my ramblings give you the impression that my children ruled my time. It is a matter of recognizing the importance of each moment of the day.
As a homemaker, I certainly did not go gracefully into that empty nest. I missed the interaction with my children so much it ached. I even said out loud that I was “retired” as a mom. (My daughter corrected me often on this, by the way.) And I found myself wondering what I was going to do with all this free time I now had. What were the things I had “always” wanted to do? The truth that kept coming back to me was that I had asked God to make me a wife and a mom; it was all I’d ever wanted, all I’d ever dreamed and day dreamed about.
Depression and laziness are ugly stepsisters. They come in and bark orders and giggle as you struggle through your days. They call you names and make you feel “less than.” And until you stand up to them like the bullies that they are, they will take over your every thought and action. This was something I could not do alone. And I am so very grateful that I have a God Who cares! (1 Peter 5:7) And even now, when I struggle with loneliness, I can turn to Him and He gives me strength to get up, move, do something.
I think we all want to matter. We all want to make a difference while we are here on planet earth. We may not know what that difference is until we see Jesus, but until then, we are called to be faithful. I am called to be faithful. Have I done everything I was placed in this generation to do? Well, I will continue to walk one step at a time, in His grace, until He calls me home. I will be sensitive to the conviction of the Holy Spirit when I am being lazy and, also, when I am overdoing it. And when He calls me home, I will relax in His presence and continue to do His will for eternity.